Vintage Skirt to Apron Refashion

I've kind of been on a runaway train with ze crafting lately. Part of it is the holidays and part of it is the impending arrival of bambino three. I think my subconscious is attempted to counterbalance all those months I'll be spending doing "nothing". And by nothing I mean keeping my children alive. Which is actually kind of important, if you think about it ...

I bought this cute handmade vintage skirt at a thrift store a year and a half ago (I know. It's tragic). I knew I wanted to turn it into an apron, but I didn't have the slightest idea how I was going to do it.

I really like aprons, partially because I'm super clumsy and tend to spill things all over myself (which is kind of a big deal when you only have two pairs of pants that fit) and partially because when I put one on, it makes me feel all ... housewife-y. It's kind of like dress-up for grown ups.


To start, I cut the skirt in half. (BTW, there was no way I was EVER going to fit into this as a skirt; vintage clothes are SO tiny.)

Merry Christmas!

May your day be merry and bright ...

This was the best of the bunch. I think we'll try again after nap time. Maybe.

... and may you not be squeezed too tightly :) 

Merry Christmas!

Hodge Podge the Hedgehog

I could not resist this little dude ...

From Pier 1

I shall call him Hodge Podge. And I shall hug him and squeeze him ...

On second thought, perhaps that's a bad idea.

Crochet Christmas Tree {POTM}

Okay, okay. One last decoration before I really am done. For real.

Really.

Sometimes I am surprised at my own ridiculousness.

It's pretty freakin' cute, though ...

It's easy, too! You work in the round (no joining and chaining action up in here!) so you get one seamless piece. I used a G hook and Red Heart Super Saver yarn.

Oh, Christmas Tree!

Hello peeps!

10 days to Christmas! Are you ready? I'm not. But then again, I'm pretty much never ready, so that's not saying much.

I did manage to festiv-ify the house! It took me nine days, partially because of the munchkins and partially because I went semi-crazy and decided I needed to make *nine thousand paper stars.

*slight exaggeration.

They're up, though!

Part of the reason it took so long was because we had a Christmas tree crisis the day after Thanksgiving. I was all set to use the artificial pre-lit 6.5 foot tree from last year. Then Grover suddenly decided it was too small. I absolutely refuse to buy a new one for full price when they'll be 75 percent off in a few weeks, so I checked Craigslist and found a 7.5 foot tree for $20! It wasn't prelit, but that was no big deal (or so I thought).

We yanked the tree out of the box and realized to our dismay it was the scraggliest little thing we'd ever seen. I, of course, forgot to take a picture, but believe me when I say it was baaaad. Luckily, we had another disassembled tree sitting in the garage that matched almost exactly. I stuffed single branches from that tree into the holey spots. I don't know where it came from, but it saved us.

After that little fiasco, I attempted to string the lights. First time I've ever done this, mind you.

I failed.

I'm not at all embarrassed to admit I left it like this for two days. 

October {Snapshots}

 Let's pause for a moment and take in the fact I (almost) caught up on something ...

Lovely. Now, on with the show.

(I already posted Halloween pictures. Check out this post for some serious cuteness.)

This time of year I am especially thankful we live in such a beautiful place.

We took advantage of the season with a giant leaf pile in Grandma Cookie's AWESOME back yard.

Who else sees the choke hold coming?

T was slightly more excited ...

Happy Thanksgiving!

Hullo peeps!

Just dropping in today to wish you and yours a wonderful Thanksgiving! On a serious note, I am crazy thankful for the awesomeness that is my life. I am soooo blessed.

On a slightly less serious note, this article on Rants from Mommyland is hilarious.

Not that I would really know ... the only time I made Thanksgiving dinner was during Grover and I's first year of marriage. I vaguely remember burning ... everything. That's about it.

I think I'll leave the making of all things delicious to the more experienced. My 8 months pregnant self is rather excited about the impending feast, despite the fact I will only be able to eat half a plate before heartburn kicks in. Tums to the rescue!

YUM YUM YUM YUM YUM YUM YUM.

:-D

Princess Polka Dot Turns One

I know this is incredibly delayed, but I figured I should share some photos of Princess Polka Dot's first birthday ...

... considering the fact my family has now banned me from planning birthday parties for the rest of eternity.

*sniffle*

I tend to get a bit ... frazzled about things like this. I looooove the decorating/crafting part, but I tend to over do that and under do the rest of the important stuff. Like cleaning. And showering. And feeding my children.

JK JK JK.

Word Vomit

There are things I do well (uhhh ... pie crust! I can make pie crust!).

And there are things I totally and completely bomb.

Like any sort of sport. And chopping wood. And cake decorating.

And "chatting".

Chatting = pure torture. I would rather be hit in the face with a sledgehammer. It's not that I don't like people. I am just awful at making conversation.

Behold, the seventh circle of hell.

Why? Because my default method of communication is word vomit. Whatever I'm thinking comes straight out my mouth, usually garbled. This means:

Crochet Infinity Scarf {POTM}

Halloooo, peeps!

It's that time again. The weather is getting colder, the snowflakes are falling, hot cocoa sounds delicious (but when does it not?) and I am constantly reminded that I am TERRIBLE at fire starting.

Luckily we can just crochet a scarf to keep us warm, right?

RIGHT!

If you are also a terrible lord of the flame, this pattern is for you ... or you could just like scarves. That's okay, too.

September {Snapshots}

September kind of disappeared on us, which was nice because it means I'm one month closer to being not pregnant but also kind of sad because all those minutes will never happen again. Know what I mean?

We did manage to make it to town for Touch-a-truck Day at the fire station ...

Hot Roller Hairpocalypse

G'day, mates!

Let's talk about hair today, shall we?

From 2005 to 2010, I had basically the same hairstyle. I cut it into a bob once, but it was more or less this:

Circa 2008.
I've been making that face every day for the past 5 years.

Then, after having T in 2011 and being attacked by an intense fear of frumpiness, I went crazy. I cut it off. Then I dyed it purple. Then blond. Then brown. Then I cut it WAY off. Then I went back to red. Then ... I don't remember what happened because I got pregnant with G and my brain flew out the window.

It hasn't returned yet, in case you were wondering. I don't remember the majority of 2012.

10 Wacky Vintage Ads

Hola peeps!

I was looking for some wall art for the freshly painted (finally) bathroom when I ran across these. They made me giggle, so I thought I'd pass along the funny/creepy weirdness.

Dr. Batty is aptly named.

Halloween Happenings and Hello, November!

Hello peeps!

Hopefully you had a wonderful holiday!  The kids painted pumpkins a few days ago ...

... and we stuck them in their costumes for some pictures on Halloween.

Someday they will both look at the camera. 

August {Snapshots}

August was a toasty-warm month, although definitely not as bad as last year (and I remember because I was miserably gigantically pregnant). We beat the heat at the splash pad ...

Dat's chilly!

Water baby

A Sticker for Hookers (and a Move)

Hola, peeps!

I'm very excited to present to you an original {walker whimsy} sticker design ...

Behold!

Proud Hooker

I know the watermark gums it up a bit, but you get the idea, yes?

Toddlers & Teenagers

Hello peeps!

It would seem T has officially hit the "terrible twos". I was at the end of my rope the other day (it's really short at the moment) and asked my mom, "How long does this LAST? *sniffle* Is this even NORMAL? *sniffle sniffle*." I was hoping a sort of "light at the end of the tunnel" would help me deal with the fact that my toddler now turns into a whining, sniffling, screaming monster whenever things aren't exactly as he thinks they should be.

You know what she said? She said, "How old is your brother?"

... the eldest just turned 21 ...

Goodbye light. Goodbye tunnel.

GOODBYE CRUEL WORLD.

It started me thinking about other ways toddlers and teenagers are alike ...

Scalloped Slippers {POTM}

Hello, hello!

I can't seem to stop making slippers, peeps! I made these and these and then I made ...

... these!

"Be Yourself" Burlap Bunting

Hello peeps,

I haven't been very crafty lately (unless you count creating another human being ... which I do), but I did spend one precious hour of free time hopping on the burlap train.

Burlap is the new black, y'all.Or gray. Or emerald. Or whatever color is in these days.

I got several yards at Walmart for $8-ish bucks and I still have a ton left. If burlap underwear start trending, I'll be ready.

First, I made a template out of scrap paper.

July {Snapshots}

At the very end of June/beginning of July, we spent a weekend in Salt Lake City with family. We had tons of fun!

Here are the kidlets at the Hill Aerospace Museum. Man, they're cute.

Winnie the Mini

Hooray! We got a car that will legally hold all the munchkins!

Allow me to introduce Winnie the Minivan.

Without duct tape, I mean ;)

It's older, there's no built-in vacuum (what do you mean I'm supposed to vacuum the car?), and there's no GPS lady voice telling me I'm going the wrong way. Therefore, it is perfect. Cute, even. Maybe not the 'ideal' car for everyone, but definitely an answer to prayer for us.

Perfection

Every day, I make a list of things that "need" to be done. And every day, I end up doing approximately half of the things I set out to do.

When I don't get things done (and done RIGHT), I feel frustrated. Worthless. My self-esteem takes a hit. Evidently my self-worth is tied to my "performance", and evidently I expect nothing less than perfect.

I should be able to do this. Everyone else has done this. People have been doing this since the beginning of time. WHY can't I do this?

A better question: why is it so important to me to do it ALL?

Crazy Easy Kid Slippers {POTM}

So I made myself these Lizzie Slippers ...

And immediately following a certain two year old yells, "Make me some swippers too, Mom!"

How could I resist? Problem is, I've always been a little intimidated by the idea of slippers. I have no idea why. It's irrational.

Some people would say my fear of spiders is irrational, too ... to which I say NOPEY nope nope.

I faced my fear (of slippers, not creepy crawlies) and came up with this super basic pattern. Seriously, it's so easy a caveman could do it, which is a BIG plus when a two-year-old is asking you every five minutes if they're done ...

These are a toddler size 7. You can easily make them bigger with the addition of a few rows (or smaller by taking some out!).

Potty Training The Boy Wonder

Parent - someone who attempts to transform tiny half-crazed animals (AKA "children") into socially correct human beings. This involves teaching them to eat with utensils, cope with their feelings, not smack their sister in the head with drum sticks, stay out of the knife drawer, and use the bathroom.

We've been working on the last one with T for the past GAZILLION YEARS month or so. Supposedly it's harder to potty train boys. Since I've had A LOT of time to reflect on this while waiting for "magic" to happen, I've thought of a few reasons why.

Potty training boys is harder (in most cases) because:

Lizzie Slippers

I found this adorable slipper pattern HERE and whipped up two pairs in almost no time. Because, you know, that's about all the time I can spare these days (hence the void of almost-nothingness ... sorry. I figured you'd rather read nothing than disorganized and decidedly uninspired drivel.)

Sooo ... here's a picture instead.

Please ignore the incredible whiteness of my feet. I really do go outside ...

... at least once a month :-)

It's a ...

Who's surprised? Me neither.

 Hooray!

Belt it, Baby! {POTM}

I know, I know. It's another baby pattern. I apologize sincerely for having baby on the brain, but it's kind of hard not to at the moment ...

If you don't have/don't know any little ones or think children should simply not exist (which means, of course, you should have never been born, either, buddy), skip this, but please continue to love me. I want you, I need you, oh baby, oh baby.

Aaaand we're back to munchkins. You see my problem?

Anyhoo, my children are string beans. They take after their dad. Consequently, they often look like they are attempting to join a gang. They've got super-cute polka dot diapers, so it doesn't bother me all that much. Since, G started walking, however, her too-long pants have been tripping her up. I figured I should remedy the problem.

Not with rubber bands like we did with T, either.

Look at me go.

Behold, a de-gansterify your baby device!

Resistance is futile.

Yesterday was a wonderful day in that I got to take a shower.

Then I noticed that my bathroom smelled like pee. A lot. And not just because of my super spidey smell senses.

I did bare minimum makeup and scraped my hair into a bun with pinched nostrils, then attempted to search out the source of the odor. Had someone peed on the floor? Had T magically decided to use his potty? Was the toilet leaking?

What the heck, man?

Photoshop Addicts Unite!

Okay, okay. I'll admit it already.

I have an addiction to over-editing photos to the brink of utter extinction.

And I'm admitting it.

Sooo, I should magically be cured now, right?

What do you mean, it doesn't work like that? WHAT THE JUNK?

If you are in the same boat (the neon green one with the wonky sail and airbrushed waves), here's some things I've learned.

And then this one time ...

... you coated your baby sister's entire head with Vaseline. 

The carnage. In three minutes flat.

Nice job, T.

I'm sure I'm going to think this is completely hilarious in 20 years, but at 6:30 in the morning after three hours of sleep, it was most definitely not.

Three applications of an immense amount of baby shampoo and twenty-seven wet wipes later, Gracelyn is still greasy. We're just going to say it's a deep conditioning treatment and try to keep her out of dust storms.

Seeing as how I haven't dusted in ... uh ... a long time, this could be difficult.

May/June {Snapshots}

Hola peeps,

I'm trying a new thing where I post some "snapshots" of life every month or two (or three or four ... ). Here's a few from May and part of June. Hopefully it will motivate me to dust off my camera.

Luckily I'll be behind the lens, so showers, real clothes and makeup will continue to be optional. HOORAY!

Here's a friendly little guy visiting our lilacs. They bloomed for a week or two and I wanted to keep the window open all the time just for the smell. Lilacs are my fave.

Here's T standing in a (very small) puddle.

Dainty Flower Bookmarks {Crochet Pattern}

Hullo peeps,

Since I missed June's POTM, here's your "bonus" crochet pattern for July.

Rumor Has It I'm the One Who Words Things Real Poor

The title is an oxymoron, in case you were wondering. If not, cool. Here's this, instead.

Come baaaaack!

Now, on with the show.

Social media has made the world the size of a peanut. Sometimes this is fantastic. Sometimes it's not.

For instance, we really don't need to know what the inside of your bathroom looks like. I'm talking to you, serial selfie-ers. Really. STAHP.

T Turns Two ~ The Trip

For T's second birthday, we attempted something almost impossible. We didn't know it was almost impossible at the time, but we sure as hell do now. I want to make sure I get all the nitty gritty details down so when my kids read this in 20 years they will buy me flowers and chocolate for being SUCH A GOOD MOM.

After T's birthday party, we, foolish first-time parents that we are, packed up the kidlets and set out for Denver. The plan was to drive while they slept, check in to a hotel, and wake up at the literal butt crack of dawn (like we do every morning) to visit the aquarium. We left at 8 p.m. It was supposed to take three hours.

If you are a veteran parent, you are now most likely laughing hysterically. Why?

Because it did not take three hours. Oh no.

Itty Bitty Baby Sandals {POTM}

***UPDATE 4/12/2015 - I've added pictures of the process. Hopefully this helps any confused crocheters out there. :)***

This is the project that never ends, it just goes on and on again ...

Remember Lamb Chop? I have only a vague recollection of the actual show. I do, however, distinctly remember being tormented by the idea of that song going on and on and on and on and on ...

Yeah. I need therapy. I know.

Luckily for us, this particular project is FINALLY finished. T got sick, then the first prototype was all wrong, then I started over, finished a pair, and lost them, then all of us got sick AGAIN, and then I was just kind of scared the universe didn't want this to happen. But finally, FINALLY, I finished a new pair last night. I think all the kinks are worked out. Maybe.

See? Love me some baby toes.

Well, then. (BIG NEWS!)

Hullo, peeps!

Here's my "reason" for being such a slacker lately ...

Crochet Camera Strap Cover {POTM}

Hayyyyy!

It's finally (FINALLY) finished!

I apologize for the, ahem, 11 day lateness of this post. I made one, hated it, and had to start over. Then the kidlets got sick and my life turned into a haze of recliner naps and medicine and snotty noses.

Everyone's back to their happy (albeit "NOT SLEEPY, MOM") selves now and life is returning to its normal chaotic pace.

Sooooo, without further ado, here ya go!

I used a G hook. If you tend to crochet tighter or looser you can use a different size hook as needed.

T Turns Two ~ The Party

Hola!

Guess what? I now have a TWO year old! I remember when Talen was a few weeks old thinking about how far off this was, but it's here in the blink of a sleep-deprived eye! *sniffle*

We celebrated a few weekends ago with a party and a trip to the Denver Aquarium and the Denver Zoo. It was insane in a good way. I did MUCH better this year planning and prepping for the party ahead of time. I didn't try to make four different types of cupcakes with homemade marshmallow fondant Sesame Street characters. I didn't blow tons of money. I didn't hot glue googly eyes to fifty suckers. I didn't stay up all night long making junk. We had pizza (not homemade). Boom!

I only went slightly overboard this time. Progress, my friends! I also forgot to take pictures beforehand, so I snapped these when we got back from Denver. Forgive me, photography gods. I am only human.

I made a pull-string mustache pinata (and for the record, I HATED how it turned out) ...

Hey!

Hey, you guys!

It's been a loonggg time. I haven't felt inspired to write in what feels like a gazillion years. Of course, now that the mood strikes, I'm exhausted, there's chores to do, the house is a disaster, Grover is working, and I'm attempting to feed a very independent eight month old (when you put food in her mouth, she spits it out, then puts it back in ALL BY HERSELF ... sigh) while assuring the toddler that his peanut butter toast will indeed be ready before he starves to death.

Really, kid.

You're going to be okay.

During my unplanned sabbatical I became the proud owner of a two-year-old and ... uh ... did other stuff.

That Escalated Quickly

I said I wasn't going to do it.

And I haven't.

Yet.

To what am I referring? Nope, not marijuana.

I am referring to going half out of my mind planning and executing a birthday party for a two-year-old.

Darling Daffodils Crochet Pattern {POTM}

Hullo peeps,

Mother Nature bequeathed 18 inches of snow upon us Monday and Tuesday, which put a damper on anything spring-ish. These happy little flowers will have to tide me over until all this white powder disappears ...

Not THAT kind of white powder ... or that kind, either.

Behold, daffodils!

And here, my friends, is the pattern: