Monday, November 28, 2011

I have not fallen off the face of the earth ... yet

Hi! Remember me?

Sorry for the sabbatical. I really had no choice. It was kind of like "take a break or watch your head explode into a thousand million pieces." I am still working on my 30 day photo challenge. I am a bit behind (as usual). Hopefully I'll be able to get some pictures up soon. Posts in December may be erratic, but as my personal life straightens out and I let of go a few responsibilities, I hope to focus on this dearly beloved blog of mine.

Okay, wow. Let's just talk about the craziness of the holidays for a minute. This is probably the first holiday season in my life where I have felt completely overwhelmed. Traveling here, then there, then back to here, budgeting and crafting and decorating and trying not to piss off any relatives. It's exhausting! And now that we have a baby munchkin there's pressure to make this time of year extra special. Which is stupid because he's not going to remember it and the most fun he'll have won't be from opening presents on Christmas morning, it will be from attempting to pull all the ornaments off the Christmas tree EVERY THREE SECONDS.

I am trying to focus less on my failures or successes and remember why we celebrate in the first place.

On that note, here's a thought for the day:

Matthew 10:29-31

New International Version (NIV)
29 Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground outside your Father’s care.[a] 30 And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. 31 So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.

No matter how much of a disaster you are, you are still precious to God. He sees the masterpiece in the sticky brown lump of clay. He believes we will become what we were created to be. It doesn't happen in a day or even a year. It's a lifelong process. All we have to do is press on and take it one day at a time.

Philippians 3:12-14

New International Version (NIV)

 12 Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. 13 Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14 I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

Happy late Thanksgiving and early Christmas! 


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Thursday, November 10, 2011

Y is for Y Chromosome

Since I gave a shout out to girl power wayyy back when I was blogging more um, er, consistently, I thought it necessary to at least say something about the opposite species sex.

I grew up in a house filled with testosterone. I have three younger brothers and no sisters, so we dirt biked, we hiked, we played in the dirt, we terrorized our mother, we punched each other in the face for fun (or at least I thought it was fun. I was, however, the one doing the punching in most cases). It was very awesome and quite interesting.

Especially if you consider falling in the toilet at 3 a.m. EVERY NIGHT interesting ...

When I found out I was pregnant, I wished and hoped that maybe, just maybe, it would be a girl. I figured surely, SURELY the cosmos would be on my side. The testosterone/estrogen ratio is so off in my family it just HAD to swing towards an XX outcome. Right?


Baby Munchkin was quite up front about his gender at the 20 week ultrasound. He did a complete flip flop just so the ultrasound tech could say, "Oh! We definitely know what you're having  ... " Then he flipped back over, then flipped over AGAIN so she could take pictures.

For proof, you know. Just in case I got it into my head I was having a girl anyway and painted the nursery pink and bought oodles of hair ribbons.

I was disappointed for about two seconds. And there's still hope. However, since the cosmos has been most uncooperative in the past, I'm not so sure I want to test that out again. I could end up with 12 boys and have to make excuses like these when they hit puberty:

The setting: futuristic Wal-Mart full of Wall-E-esque humans

Some grotesquely overweight person: (whispering) "Look at that woman! She has FIVE shopping carts!! OMG!"

Me: "Oh, is that me you're talking about? Didn't you hear the world is ending yesterday? Wait, that didn't happen? It must be TOMORROW then. PREPARE FOR THE DAY OF DOOOOMMMMM. DOOOOOMMMMM!!!!"

Or, "I'm just getting my daily rations to feed the pack of feral zombie dogs I keep in my car in case I meet someone I don't like ... (evil laughter) MUAHAHA HA HA HA HA HA."


The other day I was daydreaming about being able to buy pink things and bows and dress-up clothes and I realized I was being ungrateful. I am SO THANKFUL for my healthy little XY munchkin. He is healthy, he is perfect, he is happy and amazing and wonderful. I am very lucky.

So, despite the fact that he will always find peeing outside fascinating, I love my Y baby :)

And so help me God, he is going to learn proper toilet seat etiquette.


that's what you think, mom. you forgot i'm in charge here.
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30 Day Photo Challenge ~ Day 6

Day 6 ~ Books

Dr. Seuss, my favorite author

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Wednesday, November 9, 2011

X is for X Chromosome

AND NOW ... you get exclusive access into my brain. Inside Edition, people! If my thought process were a movie it would be incredibly epic.

 Like Inception.

Without the cleverness.

Or the Leonardo DiCaprio.

This is my brain trying desperately to figure out what to write about for this a2z post:

X, x, hmm ... xylophone! But why would I write a whole post about a xylophone? 

I could just retype the X page from Dr. Seuss's A, B, C, Book ...

What else starts with X. Xavier? As in Charles Xavier? I don't even like X-Men. Except for Hugh Jackman. But that is beside the point.

I know, Vin Diesel! Wasn't he Triple-X in one of his movies or something? I could discuss the incredibly diabolical way in which he names his movies. Really, who else would have thought to take out one little conjunction (is "the" a conjunction? Conjunction Junction, what's your function? Hooking up words and phrases and clauses ... )Boom! It's a whole new movie title. And then when you see it on TV you can't figure out which one's what because you can't remember what went where. 

Or rather "the".

But wait ... the title of the post would be XXX.

Not going there.

Back to square number uno.

Numbers ... x ... that reminds me of college algebra!

What happens if you divide x by x? Does it cease to exist?


This is why I love algebra.

Wait a second .... XX ... that reminds me of something ...





WHAT A COMPLETELY NERDY, RANDOM, UNRELATED THING TO THINK OF ... it's PERFECT! I could write a deep, thought-provoking post about the differences between men and women and the nature/nurture debate. 

Yeah, that would be fun!

Or not.

After all that laboriousness, I realized all I really wanted to say is this:

Girls Rock.

The End.


This Post was brought to you today by Sleep Deprivation and the letter X.

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Bloggy ADHD

See those baby ducks? Those are like my thoughts.
Completely disorganized.
Mmhmm, yes see I do, young Padawan.
See what I mean? Ducks to Yoda?
How did that even HAPPEN?!?
Soooo ... in case you haven't noticed, I am not a "niche" blogger. Probably because my brain doesn't work in "niches". More like, "photography, parenthood, holidays, crocheting, recipes, manicures, mothering, Christianity, crafting .... ohhh, looky. Something SHINY!"

I may have bloggy ADHD. But that's okay. I'm being true to my personality in all its fractured glory. It's more fun that way.

For people who enjoy order, however, it might be a teensy bit overwhelming to read through my blog posts. As in, it could give you Internet whiplash. I'm all over the map with my subjects.

To address this, one of the upcoming changes I'll be making is adding navigation. If you're visiting from Crochet Pattern Central to get the mustache tutorial, there will be a link to the rest of my crochet patterns (except I don't have any other crochet patterns yet. Oh yeah). If you saw a manicure on Pinterest, you'll be able to go to the rest of the mani posts with the click of a mouse.

You can still get the full force of my all-over-the-mapness by going to the home page if you so desire.

I'm also thinking about posting specific subjects on specific days. That's still in the works, though. Hopefully as I start blogging more, it will evolve naturally.

Here's hoping this will retain some of the 5,000+ visitors this site has gotten. Woo!

I love you, my dear followers. And I will get some organization going on up in here!


P.S. Roo over at {NiceGirlNotes} has a great post about niche-ness for all the rest of you un-niche-esque bloggers. You can find it here.
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30 Day Photo Challenge ~ Day 5

Day 5 ~ Morning Sky

and the reason I was up to take a picture of the morning sky ... COFFEE!!!

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W is for WoW

Before munchkin came along, I used to ponder what it would be like to have a kid. I figured it would be tough. Most people I talked to, in fact, made it seem like hell. Countless sleepless nights? Surely they are overexaggerating. It can't really be that hard to take care of something the size of a Christmas turkey, can it?

For some stupid, stupid reason, I thought those people were mistaken. Teething sucks? Yeah, whatever. You will change one million diapers. Uh huh. Right. You won't sleep, even if your baby sleeps, because you will be lying awake staring at the ceiling fan and worrying about whether or not your baby is sleeping. That's just ridiculous. Who would be that illogical?

The answer: me. And yet, what no one tells you is that somehow, for some strange reason, you don't really mind changing your kid's diaper for the fiftieth time that day. You are willing to stay up until three o'clock in the morning rocking your screaming child. Are you exhausted? Absolutely. Are you desperately wishing your child would stop crying? Most definitely. But through it all, you would go to the ends of the earth for them. You would take their place a million times over if you could.

Being a parent has given me whole new insight into what God went through giving up his only Son. Wow.

So despite the fact giant dog hair solar systems dance whimsically around grimy baseboards and both bedrooms look like WWIII and Project Runway collided and I haven't done the dishes in ... when was the last time I did the dishes? Hmm ...

It doesn't matter.

As the most awesome and amazing Beatles put it, Love Is All You Need ...

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Tuesday, November 8, 2011

30 Day Photo Challenge ~ Day 3 & 4

Day 3 ~ Happiness
"you are my sunshine, my only sunshine. you make me hap-PPPPYYY when skies are gray ... "
Day 4 ~ Leaves
As in, the leaves I have yet to rake up. Bad housewife!

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V is for Verse

As in Scripture Verse.

My favorite is 1 John 4:4 ~ Greater is He who is in me that he who is in the world!

What's your favorite verse?

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Monday, November 7, 2011

Glitter Ombre Nails

The original inspiration for this idea came from ... Pinterest. Yeah ...

It is SO EASY!

1. Paint your nails a solid color.

2. Pour out a quarter size blob of your favorite glitter nail polish on a paper plate.

3. Use a clean makeup sponge to dab glitter on your nails. Concentrate on the tip and then taper off as you go down for an ombre effect.

4. Add a topcoat.



P.S. Colors are E.L.F. Black and Pure Ice Cheatin' : )
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Sunday, November 6, 2011

30 Day Photo Challenge ~ Day 2

Day 2 ~ Smile
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Saturday, November 5, 2011

30 Day Photo Challenge ~ Day 1

Day 1 ~ Favorite Food

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Friday, November 4, 2011

30 Day Photo Challenge

With the holidays coming up, it's incredibly easy to forget to enjoy the most wonderful time of the year.

 (You know, because we all love being buried in 15 feet of snow, scraping ice off our car windows EVERY DAY, putting coats on and taking them off and putting them on and taking them off again :P)

Whilst trolling Pinterest, I came across a thirty day photo challenge of things you're grateful for from Positively Present. November is a perfect time to be thankful ... and what better way to be thankful for my shiny new camera than this! Plus it will help me forget that it is FREEZING outside!

I may post a photo every day or post a week's worth ... y'all know how I am about structure ... as in, there is no such thing ...

I'll try to post at least once a week!

Join me if you dare :-)


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Thursday, November 3, 2011

U is for Urine

"I am going to be sooo embarrassed by this blog post when I'm fifteen ... "
It's funny how your life becomes completely centered around bodily functions when you have a kid. Their eating, their pooping, their sleeping, their peeing. Over and over and over. And now, YOU GET TO HEAR ALL ABOUT IT!


Having a baby boy makes diaper changing verrrry interesting.

The third or fourth time I changed Baby Munchkin at home, I turned away for two seconds and realized I had a fountain spewing from the changing table all over the carpet. Since we're renters, I panicked and tried to catch it. With my entire upper body. Including my face.

Baby T: 1
Mommy: 0

"oopsie ... was your mouth open, mom?
my bad .... "
When he was about three months, I had a brilliant idea to change Baby Munchkin on my lap in the car. I had just finished feeding him and we were in a hurry, so I figured it would be quicker that way. Guess what happened?

Yes, he did. All over my lap. BEFORE I had to go get groceries in Wal-Mart. People looked at me funny. And it was too hard to explain the real story, so I just pretended I had escaped from a mental hospital.

Not really. But that would have been. EPIC.

Baby T: 2
Mommy: 0

The other day, Baby Munchkin peed on me again. While I was at work (I take him with me to my part-time job). And I didn't realize it until I went to the bank and noticed my leg felt kinda weird.

The worst part? I was wearing khakis. KHAKIS.

"got her again! high-five my baby homies! WUT!"
Baby T: 3
Mommy: 0

And finally, remember when an older, wiser person told you your bladder would go to sh*t after giving birth?

I have become that older, wiser person.

I took up running, you see. And running plus a post-baby bladder (and forgetting to do Kegels) DO NOT MIX. Trust me on this.

Baby T: 4
Mommy: 0

I was just extremely thankful I had a pair of warm-up pants to put on for the walk home. Because nobody would believe the mental hospital routine in a town as small as mine ...

Or maybe they would ...

T Dubbs FTW. 


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Wednesday, November 2, 2011


My dog is gone.

We took him to a new home. Hopefully he will be much happier than he was here. The whole scenario has been a mess since we got him two years ago. For some reason, Bean just didn't get along with the hubby (or anyone else). He was constantly hiding from Chance and running away and eating diapers and peeing on the floor and getting in the trash can and jumping on the baby's head and mauling our guests. And then there was that time when he ate an entire bottle of ibuprofen and had to get his stomach pumped so he wouldn't die. 

That was one of many incidents.

Sooo ... yeah, he was a bad dog. He will be much happier with my grandparents. He will get plenty of attention and they actually have time to discipline him and there are no babies for him to jump on. It's PERFECT.

I miss him. But I know this is for the best. And I'm gonna be a grown up about it. Really.

And the rest of the universe is extremely happy and my house is finally peaceful again. That's what really matters.

While I'm getting over this (oh, the melodrama), I'm spending plenty of time hugging and squeezing Baby Munchkin.

They grow up so fast.


P.S. Blogging is good therapy. Even if everyone else thinks I'm just a sappy hormonal idiot. 

Which I am.

But that is beside the point.
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