Earlier posts in this series:
I've been waffling about sharing this part. It's personal. Like, really personal. But I think the possible benefits outweigh the risks, so here goes. *gulp*
If you, yes you, stumble across this post and are dealing with suicidal thoughts, please tell someone. Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 or talk to a friend or family member you trust. You are not alone.
This is where I was almost two years ago.
***
Ultimately, I didn't listen to the midwife.
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One, two, THREE. Beautiful little humans. |
But she got to me. Boy, did she ever.
My worst fears were confirmed. It was my fault. All of this. My inability to cope. My inability to attach to my child.
I simply wasn't good enough.
There was no escape from the problem because the problem was ME.