I grew up in a house filled with testosterone. I have three younger brothers and no sisters, so we dirt biked, we hiked, we played in the dirt, we terrorized our mother, we punched each other in the face for fun (or at least I thought it was fun. I was, however, the one doing the punching in most cases). It was very awesome and quite interesting.
Especially if you consider falling in the toilet at 3 a.m. EVERY NIGHT interesting ...
When I found out I was pregnant, I wished and hoped that maybe, just maybe, it would be a girl. I figured surely, SURELY the cosmos would be on my side. The testosterone/estrogen ratio is so off in my family it just HAD to swing towards an XX outcome. Right?
Wrong.
Baby Munchkin was quite up front about his gender at the 20 week ultrasound. He did a complete flip flop just so the ultrasound tech could say, "Oh! We definitely know what you're having ... " Then he flipped back over, then flipped over AGAIN so she could take pictures.
For proof, you know. Just in case I got it into my head I was having a girl anyway and painted the nursery pink and bought oodles of hair ribbons.
I was disappointed for about two seconds. And there's still hope. However, since the cosmos has been most uncooperative in the past, I'm not so sure I want to test that out again. I could end up with 12 boys and have to make excuses like these when they hit puberty:
The setting: futuristic Wal-Mart full of Wall-E-esque humans
Some grotesquely overweight person: (whispering) "Look at that woman! She has FIVE shopping carts!! OMG!"
Me: "Oh, is that me you're talking about? Didn't you hear the world is ending yesterday? Wait, that didn't happen? It must be TOMORROW then. PREPARE FOR THE DAY OF DOOOOMMMMM. DOOOOOMMMMM!!!!"
Or, "I'm just getting my daily rations to feed the pack of feral zombie dogs I keep in my car in case I meet someone I don't like ... (evil laughter) MUAHAHA HA HA HA HA HA."
Or, "I'M AN EXTREME COUPONER. NO, I DO NOT NEED REHAB. OH, SNAP! DID I TAKE THE LAST 17 BOXES OF TWINKIES? YES, I DID, beyatch. DEAL WIT' IT."
The other day I was daydreaming about being able to buy pink things and bows and dress-up clothes and I realized I was being ungrateful. I am SO THANKFUL for my healthy little XY munchkin. He is healthy, he is perfect, he is happy and amazing and wonderful. I am very lucky.
So, despite the fact that he will always find peeing outside fascinating, I love my Y baby :)
Especially if you consider falling in the toilet at 3 a.m. EVERY NIGHT interesting ...
When I found out I was pregnant, I wished and hoped that maybe, just maybe, it would be a girl. I figured surely, SURELY the cosmos would be on my side. The testosterone/estrogen ratio is so off in my family it just HAD to swing towards an XX outcome. Right?
Wrong.
Baby Munchkin was quite up front about his gender at the 20 week ultrasound. He did a complete flip flop just so the ultrasound tech could say, "Oh! We definitely know what you're having ... " Then he flipped back over, then flipped over AGAIN so she could take pictures.
For proof, you know. Just in case I got it into my head I was having a girl anyway and painted the nursery pink and bought oodles of hair ribbons.
I was disappointed for about two seconds. And there's still hope. However, since the cosmos has been most uncooperative in the past, I'm not so sure I want to test that out again. I could end up with 12 boys and have to make excuses like these when they hit puberty:
The setting: futuristic Wal-Mart full of Wall-E-esque humans
Some grotesquely overweight person: (whispering) "Look at that woman! She has FIVE shopping carts!! OMG!"
Me: "Oh, is that me you're talking about? Didn't you hear the world is ending yesterday? Wait, that didn't happen? It must be TOMORROW then. PREPARE FOR THE DAY OF DOOOOMMMMM. DOOOOOMMMMM!!!!"
Or, "I'm just getting my daily rations to feed the pack of feral zombie dogs I keep in my car in case I meet someone I don't like ... (evil laughter) MUAHAHA HA HA HA HA HA."
Or, "I'M AN EXTREME COUPONER. NO, I DO NOT NEED REHAB. OH, SNAP! DID I TAKE THE LAST 17 BOXES OF TWINKIES? YES, I DID, beyatch. DEAL WIT' IT."
The other day I was daydreaming about being able to buy pink things and bows and dress-up clothes and I realized I was being ungrateful. I am SO THANKFUL for my healthy little XY munchkin. He is healthy, he is perfect, he is happy and amazing and wonderful. I am very lucky.
So, despite the fact that he will always find peeing outside fascinating, I love my Y baby :)
And so help me God, he is going to learn proper toilet seat etiquette.
Caiti
that's what you think, mom. you forgot i'm in charge here. |
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